Who else also hates the tv in the daytime? An example of this is a commercial that asks you if you like your job and then they say they can get you into a college and get your degree in 7 weeks and then you'll be as happy as ever and you'll be able to spend time with your friends and family. "Do you hate your life and job?" "Ugh hugh" "Do you wanna have a better job?" "Yes!" "We can get you enrolled in ragclothes college online and get you the degree of your choice in just 7 short weeks! Now you can do what you want with your life and not have to worry about working all day every day at 3 jobs! Remember, this is a one-time opportunity, call in the next 5 seconds and recieve a free car! TOO LATE!" What about those commercials that ask if you've fallen in the past month, and if you have, you may be eligible for a free life alert and a free scooter power chair! "Have you fallen in the past month?" "Oh my god!" "Then you may be eligible for life alert!" "Splenda! no that aint right! Splendid!" "now you can say something directly into the life alert by pushing the button on the front by saying something like this!" "I've fallen and i can't get up!" "we're sending help immediatley, i'm calling paramedics and your family, mrs. fletcher." "see, protect yourself!"
1.) I had explosive diarrhea
2.) I Got Food poisioning from a bad glass of milk
3.) I Just found out i was lactose intolerant
4.) My mom decided to home school me...she gave up on me so i'm back!
5.) I was kidnapped!
6.) My house caught fire!
7.) My father's brother's nephew's cousin's former roomate died and i had to attend the funeral
8.) I read online that all the teachers were taking a day off
9.) Because i said so
10.) I had to redo my homework because my dog did my homework and then ate it...
12.) I was thinking of excuses to be late!
13.) I didn't have the motivation, so i just didn't come.
14.) I was working so i could get money to get into college!
15.) We had a power outage last night!
16.) I went to sleep at like 3 finishing homework from my math class!
17.) A Skunk sprayed me right as i was walking out to my car!
18.) I decided to go green by not burning any energy today!
19.) I was watching videos on youtube on how to become a vegan
20.) A mouse was in my bedroom
21.) I had to figure out how to apply the thing we're learning in class to real life
22.) I visited a college!
23.) It was my birthday!
24.) I dropped my phone in the toilet!
25.) I just got a new car, so i figure i take it out for a cruise before work... i got lost.
26.) I fell down the stairs sleepwalking last night... wanna see my bruises?
27.) I was thinking about life and politics and deep thoughts about the future and then i realized that i hadn't left the house yet.
This is where i messed up :/
29.) I forgot where my car keys where!
30.) I forgot how to breathe
31.) I saw my parents doing it :i
32.) I found this way to make money online and i made $7,000 in the week i wasn't at school, i don't need school anymore
33.) Who needs school when you got swag?
34.) The Good lord knew it was best for me to be an hour late today
35.) I got one of those tempur pedic beds and i couldn't get out of it, i was stuck in the bed.
36.) I had to explain to my 4 year old where babies come from
37.) Two guys were holding up traffic with an invisible rope
38.) No, Why were YOU late?
39.) I was pretending to be a cat!
40.) Dude, I attended woodstock!
41.) My 65 Pound Pooch Wouldn't get off my lap!
42.) I had to attend a Religious ceremony
43.) I saw a transformer!
44.) My underwear shrunk in the dryer!
45.) I had to dance in the rain! We haven't had rain all summer long!
46.) I don't have an excuse... but i have the phone number to the man's mailbox that i hit
47.) Idk, pick a excuse for me!
48.) The Flex capacitor failed on me
49.) Today was senior skip day!
50.) Long story...
Listen man, if you wanna be good at something so you can show it, or if you want to show it off to the ladies, or become famous and have lots of fans (I got young ones, i got fans that are a little older, but yet they're still not bad, and i also have old, tall, brittle fans. I even have hot fans). But listen, i remember last summer when i had 10 subscribers, i thought i had it made it. I had thought i had made it big (lies and deception). Now i'm going to tell you something that you may or may not of ever hear before, You can get anything you want in this life if you work for it. Anything you want, you can have. But here's a secret;Ya gotta work, work, work, work, work, and when you think you've made it, you gotta work, work, work, work, work even harder! The world does not stop for dream chasers (yet). Don't wait till you can see the other side, do it now. Don't be like that man on 'Up' that forgot about his dreams until his wife passed, medicare won't pay for your mishaps. But if you find your dreams later in life, the end of your life will be handed to you on a silver platter. my friend Sammy Hagar... well he's not my friend... i call everyone my friend... maybe thats why i don't have friends... He came from virtually nothing. He literatly had to work all summer long just to afford a pair of school shoes, and now he's a rock LEDGEND! You'll have to be willing to the extra mile to acchieve something that you wanna do. You're going to have to make a lot of sacrifices and a lot of changes in order to get what you want to get done. You can't just sit around and say "I'm going to do this someday" and never do it. Instead of procrastinating, do it now! You can't just assume it's going to happen, you have to make it happen! You have to make sure it happens by not just following your dreams, but making it happen and chasing your dreams! In fact, put your dreams in a headlock, make sure they know what they're supposed to do. Everybody is entitled to their own dream, nomatter how small or how big it is. You have to have something you wanna keep shooting for and keep trying for. It could be as big as becoming the next justin bieber... wait how did he get famous again? or it could be as getting your dream bedroom or getting the job you want. maybe your dream, like me is to get in front of a camera and make people laugh.(beavus and butthead dialouge here) But everyone wants to acchieve something in their life, and for the most part, people want to become famous. That means everyone, your mom, your dad, your brother, your sister, your dog, your deceased fish, that guy next to you in math class... your grandma's best friend from 2nd grade back in the 1940's... But not many people really accomplish their dreams. Do they not chase after their dreams because they thought they couldn't make it? Did they not chase after their dreams because they thought they were worthless? Did they chase after their dreams and discover that they can't do what they wanted to do? I mean you literatly have to put every good idea in the trash and make eveverything excellent, and even after that, you have to make it better and make more! You have to block out the people that don't believe in you, you have to block out spectators, commentors, your parents, society, you have to block out everyone that gets in your way. don't stop chasing your dreams becuase someone says you can't make it, or you find your place and you can't do it. Even if you want to be a famous basketball player and can't dribble, you want to be a doctor and you can't put on a band-aide. You don't have to be the best to be the best, you just have to believe in yourself. You can be the worst person out there looking, but you could have amazing talent. you could be really famous, and not have much talent. Don't let anyone say that you can't do it because your not good at something... and even if you aren't good at it, you can get better at it. You gotta block out everything and you gotta do what you wanna do nomatter what it takes to get there. Now if you have a dream, get off this video and go do it, because you're missing out! The only thing better than chasing your dreams is living your dreams. it doesn't get any better than that, now shouldn't you be chasing your dreams right now?